What happens when mom has been under the weather?


Does anyone see Laura in there? We haven’t seen her since Saturday.

Summer has barely begun and OOOOO MMMMM GGGGG we’re clearly going to have to find some outdoor activities to keep Laura busy. Once we find her.

Or we could reconsider sleep away camp this year. Once we find her.

Consider this conversation earlier in the week, before Laura went missing:

Laura: “I really want to go to sleep-away camp.”

Mom: “Not this summer. Maybe in the future.”

Laura: “Mom, I’m ready to go to sleep-away camp. It’s you and dad who are having trouble.”

Mom: “And that’s precisely the trouble that’s keeping you home.”

So, I HINTED that I’m under the weather, but since no hot doctors have been involved in the details (so far), I’m all meh on sharing the details because meh I’m bored of medical details (that don’t involve hot doctors).

Meanwhile, I will share another photo because it provides clear and convincing evidence, maybe even evidence beyond a reasonable doubt, the sort of proof people want to see when they have questions. In this case, my photographic evidence demonstrates what mortal men are capable of doing when absolutely necessary.

I had to be driven to a doctor’s appointment on Friday. (Not a hot doctor.) (What’s up with my karma?) (Frick.) Also, on Friday Laura had an appointment (made a month before the whole needing-to-go-to-the-doctor business happened) to get purple tips put in her hair, which purple tips I’d promised she could have for summer (such colors are not allowed at school, so it had to be summer), and the hairdresser was going on vacation for several weeks, so the appointment had to be Friday. And, gosh darn it, in my weakened condition I decided that if I had to move Heaven and Earth, that kid was getting her purple tips for the summer.


Tom took me to my doctor’s appointment and then drove Laura to the hair salon to have purple tips put in her hair, proving that we have our priorities straight. Also? Who said men can’t multitask?

35 comments on “Can You Help Us Find Our Child?”

  1. I love the purple tips!!!

    I have a room like that upstairs, only it’s not pink. It’s dark and creepy and all the drawers are pulled open but the clothes are all on the floor. I threatened to clean it while he is away.

  2. OMG I want purple tips too! And toenails!
    When your daughter is a little older she can nerd out all summer at the Cornell Summer school for high school kids–there is probably, I am not kidding, a program where you can study ducks all summer and get credit for it too! Or math! She loves math. It doesn’t snow here in the summer. Sunny and 70 everyday ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. Dude. All I can say to this is that if that were a photo of Lenna’s room, I would be thrilled that she’d cleaned it. I wish I were lying.

    Also? I love Laura’s hair! That is freaking adorable.

  4. Awesome room! Dirty and all. My daughter would’ve swooned over a room like that.

    I am wanting some purple tips now!

    Hope you are feeling much better!

  5. Laura has my dream room [when I was a little girl]. So pretty!

    I hope you feel better soon and that it’s nothing serious. Maybe you should get purple tips too?

    Laura’s hair looks fantastic! I love it!

  6. Nice hair… normal room ๐Ÿ™‚

    I made a deal with my daughter at one stage. I only entered her room with written notice (on a post-it note admittedly). With several hours notice, it often looked deceptively tidy, although mainly through stacking and piling and under-the-bed hiding.

    Now she’s a lovely 19 year old young woman. With a messy room.

    May the hot docs be the cure…

  7. I see nothing at all wrong with that child’s room. And by that I mean, I have a room or two that look just like that at my house and I want to believe there’s nothing wrong with that.

    And, if Laura is anything like The Boy, you’ll find her by the smell. Eventually.

  8. Mine came out of her dwelling to complain about my being sick because it is cutting into her social life.

    I might send her straight back into the fray.

    Also: Am I too old for purple tips? Because they are too cute.

  9. The purple tips were likely for camouflage purposes. You were tricked into this. She’ll likely only become visible once promised the go-away camp. Just letting you know….

  10. Laura’s hair? Awesome!
    What would purple tips look like on blond hair? hmmm…I wonder if I can work an appointment in while I’m there…. ๐Ÿ˜€

    That room? It’s so pink! I have what SmallTownMom has…it’s scareeeeee! I tend to keep the door shut unless it’s absolutely necessary to open it!

    I do hope that you are feeling better…and whatever the ailment, a hawt doc is always something good!

  11. That reminds of me of that Shel Silverstein poem about the girl who wouldn’t clean her room. I don’t remember the name, but it reminds me of that. When I was a teenager, my parents finally gave up and just made me keep the door clothes, well that was after my dad got so frustrated he threw all my clothes over my balcony onto the front yard. After that, I just kept the door closed. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Is it appropriate for adults (like me) to get purple tips. I’d like some. Can my job fire me for them?

  12. Absolutely hilarious! The room that is. The hair, now that is brilliant. I just love a girl with purple tips : ).

    Hope you feel better soon.

    At least she contains the mess to one room of the house, right?

  13. I don’t get it? What’s wrong with that room?

    Clearly, no one should come over my house right now.

    Love, love the tips. How fun!

    And you, get better!

  14. Feel better soon, k! Big hug!

    And that room is darling as is the girl all snuggled in the bed! And those purple tips are way cool.

    I WISH my orange roots (that I have to go back and get fixed tomorrow) were that cool!!!

    Love you!

  15. You know they can sense when you’re in a weakened state too? It takes about 24 hours for our entire house to go from normal to that when I’m unwell. Still, it could be worse. I came home from hospital recently, after leaving my daughter at home in my brother’s ‘care’, to find mouse poo and garbage all over my kitchen bench.

  16. Purple tips rule! I’m going for pink, myself. Or maybe Little Dude will end up with pink after he gets back from Scout camp.

    As for sleepaway camp? Laura’s ready.

    Da Goddess

  17. i wish i had a beautiful bedroom like that! i always had to share the bedroom with my sister (who is 100x messier than laura).
    and i love the purple tips.
    and really, you should have gone with her and gotten your tips done too. it’d have made you feel better.
    kudos to your husband!
    and get well soon!

  18. I can’t top Gina’s hilarious comment. I hope Laura is found under there. Purple tips and all. And I hope her mama is feeling better.

  19. I did purple highlights in Carlie’s hair. It’s da bomb. I even offered to do it the SECOND TO LAST day of school and see if she could get sent home the last day. And my kid? Didn’t want to risk it. What’s with these goody two-shoes kids we’re raising?

    I told the suture fried that I want to throw a twitter bridal shower. OMG, we are so cutting edge.

  20. The relief I feel that it is not only my daughter that goes missing in a very similar fashion.

    I hope you are OK – it is hard being so very far away and not check in with you personally!

  21. No doubt the purple tips are contributing to her camouflage abilities in that gorgeously colorific room. (Did someone else also say that? I don’t have time to read through 3200 comments…you popular blogger, you! I’m just glad I now know how I can get my own up again.)

  22. no offence, but can u post a new post already?? no offence or anything but every time i view ur blog its the same thing. can u post the magazine? how many have u sold yet??

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